I’ve been ruined by Long Long Man, the greatest love story ever told by Japanese gum commercials

As we all know, candy is an extremely important part of life. Chi-chan, the star of a series of commercials by Japanese gum company Sakeru that has utterly ravaged everything I thought I knew about life, believes this deeply. She and her boyfriend Tooru-san are huge fans of Sakeru Gummy, a line of “rippable” chewing gum that comes in both short and “looong” formats. The practical, down to earth Tooru-san prefers the smaller, more traditional size of gum. Unfortunately for him, however, Chi-chan’s desires are more... unconventional.